“Hey Martin! Simon from PPC here! Got your email about our work, and I gotta say- this isn’t an easy job here, friend. I know you’ve requested more ‘permanent’ solutions beyond relocating, but even that might be damn near impossible. I’ll shoot straight with ya- nothing we’re doing seems to work. The bear traps are broken the next day after we put ‘em down. We destroy one beehive, two more are nearby within a few days. Beyond scorched earth to the rest of the forest, I’m really not quite sure what else we can do here. We can’t start poisoning streams or rivers- it’d mess with town water supplies. We’ll keep trying our best here, but I’m telling you, if you think we’re pulling your leg: shop around. We’re doing just what everyone else would be doing. I haven’t seen anything like this…ever. These are some of the most resilient wildlife I’ve ever come across. Feel free to call me back when you get a chance, so I can go over the next invoice. Later!”